Episode 5: Why I Turned Down A Specialized High School
“I peeked over at my neighbor’s list with wide eyes. None of the high schools on her list were close to us in Queens. The closest one was two buses and a train away, a nearly three hour round trip, marked number one and titled as Stuyvesant.”
Full Transcript
Fatimah reported this episode as a high school senior. She lives in Queens.
By Fatimah Asad
Right now I’m walking into my first-period Class — Architectural Drafting. The class is on the third floor of my massive school building. The hallways of my school are covered in tile, so you can pretty much hear every student walking, as the click of their heels cannot be missed.
There are not many high schools in my neighborhood of Jamaica, Queens, in New York City, or anywhere that incorporate the engineering software AutoCAD within their classes. But in Thomas A Edison Career Technical Education HS it's actually pretty common.
In Architectural Drafting, I am currently building a floor plan of a house. It’s fun watching my drawing come to life, but the process of creating each floor plan is tedious. First, the walls of the house have to be created. Then, the materials have to be chosen. And you can’t forget about the individual floor plans that must be created for each electrical unit, plumbing, and every window.
But wait. Let's back up for a second. The third floor of my high school is cool, but how did I get here? It wasn’t simply by walking the fourteen blocks from my house. My actual journey to arrive at this building was much more complex.
Thomas A. Edison Career and Technical Education High School / Photo courtesy Wikimedia Commons
Hi, my name is Fatimah. I’m a twelfth-grade student at Thomas Edison. I live in Jamaica, Queens, and I’m an avid reader and plant lover. Back in middle school, I was just beginning to explore the fields that I wanted to work in, professionally. One of the fields I kept coming back to was architecture. Architecture made me believe in creativity. The idea that people could create establishments that can serve multiple purposes, and provide meaning, felt unfathomable. In middle school, Architecture became my dream. Being able to study it in high school was my goal.
Every student in NYC public schools goes through the high school admissions process. About 80,000 eighth graders every year researching, and ranking, and waiting, and ultimately landing in one of more than 400 high schools.
My process surprised lots of people. Not because of the school — Edison — that I got into. But because of the school I turned down.
To be fair, the school I turned down wasn’t just any high school. It was Bronx Science. Viewed by many as one of the best high schools in New York City. Maybe one of the best in the entire country.
But have I regretted my decision? Not for a second. So why were others surprised? And what does my story reveal about what needs to change in the NYC high school admissions process? I’m glad you asked.
The high school application process began in eighth grade. In September, we were visited by guidance counselors on a weekly basis for information on the entire high school application process and to discuss our plans for high school. I’ll never forget the first meeting. My guidance counselor put up a poster with a map of all the New York City Public High Schools. My friend was sitting next to me. With one glance at the chart, her hand immediately shot up. She asked, “Where are the SHSAT schools? The important ones?” …To which my guidance counselor responded, “That is for tonight. You can bring your parents to the assembly after school for more information about the specialized admissions process.” She spoke with a heavy emphasis on specialization.
For those of you who don’t know, SHSAT schools (which stands for Specialized High School Admissions Test) are NYC public high schools that use a multiple-choice exam to determine who is accepted into the school. There are nine specialized high schools in New York City. Among them, the most well-known include Stuyvesant High School, The Bronx High School of Science, and Brooklyn Technical High School. Another one — a famous art school called LaGuardia — admits students based on auditions.
“Was my worth defined by the ability to receive an offer to a high school?”
Among students and parents in my school community, specialized high schools were considered to offer the best public education around. My school community had people of color, people of all ages, and of all household incomes. Unfortunately, the specialized high school admissions process did not consider the entirety of my school community. This is because only a handful of children would ever have the option to pay for tutoring, which would greatly improve their chances of getting a high score on the exam. In comparison to specialized high schools, local schools were seen as the places everyone went if they had no “plan.”
Surrounded by the constant chatter about specialized high schools, and students who were thrilled to apply, I quickly learned that specialized high schools weren’t just popular. Specialized high schools were glamorized. The specialized high school exam was known as the “mark” of acceptance, reserved only for the smartest children.
While some of my peers had been studying for the SHSAT since fifth grade, I never bothered to open the practice book, I never studied for the SHSAT, took interest, or wanted to apply to a specialized high school. I had a keen interest in trying hard in school, and was a straight-A student. But the idea of traveling in rush hour — two hours and forty-six minutes, with two transfers, and more than a half-hour of walking — to reach a mere high school seemed, well, nuts. Plus, I wondered why there was a separation between the non-specialized and specialized high school application process. In my mind, high schools were just high schools. But apparently, there was a label to clearly differentiate between the two.
Fast forward to the middle of eighth grade. Around December, the application process kicked into high gear. All middle school students were required to submit the draft of their high school list — a ranking of their school choices, listed in order of preference. I was panicking at the idea of high school, but had a rough outline of the schools I wanted to attend. I was not worried about the application process itself. I was worried about what I was going to be doing in high school, because, to me, high school was an introduction to the real world.
Eighth grade me was definitely scared that high school was going to be academically challenging. You probably remember this period in your life, when all of your teachers constantly say things like, “You won’t be able to get away with this in high school.” It’s intimidating!
Drafting out my list, I looked at the choices. I saw everyone around me holding the bright red booklet with the specialized high school list in front of them. I had forgotten mine. I desperately wanted hands-on experience in the architectural field, so I put Edison at the top of my list. I peeked over at my neighbor’s list with wide eyes. None of the high schools on her list were close to us in Queens. The closest one was two buses and a train away, a nearly three hour round trip, marked number one and titled as Stuyvesant.
After receiving the impression that specialized high schools were important, I decided to also rank The Bronx High School of Science, Brooklyn Technical High School, and Stuyvesant High School. Although I didn’t study for the SHSAT, I decided at the last minute to go ahead and take the test.
The SHSAT is administered once a year for eighth and ninth graders and takes three hours to complete. It was agonizing to sit and complete problems for hours on end. A few weeks after the test, I submitted my official high school list to an online portal, and then it was time to wait for acceptances…
In March the envelopes finally came. The entire middle school seemed chaotic, and teachers could barely control the excitement themselves. I felt scared, a mix of emotions that were combined with the feeling of throwing up. I knew that there was one school I wanted to attend, but what if I could prove that I could get into one of these top schools as well?
I peeled open the envelope and was thrilled to see that I had been accepted to Bronx Science and Thomas A Edison CTE High School. I had a choice to make. But it was clear which high school I wanted to go to. A twelve minute walk, and a five minute drive, I had no intentions of traveling farther than necessary. So, I committed to Thomas A Edison CTE HS without giving it a second thought.
When I told everyone I was committing to Thomas Edison, they were stunned. I received the impression that I was just going to be attending “another public school.” When my friends bragged about being accepted into specialized high schools, I felt left out. So I told them that I had been accepted as well. They looked at me with wide eyes and asked to see my acceptance letter, gasping when they read “Congratulations on your acceptance…” and following along to see the two schools written below. They grabbed the letter from my hands as if they did not believe me. Their eyes were filled with confusion that I had not chosen to accept the specialized high school offer that I received.
I was surprised by the lack of support. I felt belittled. Was my worth defined by the ability to receive an offer to a high school? Is that what determined me as “smart?” Why were my friends so eager to travel for three hours? Weren’t there more than nine high school diplomas worth receiving?
The high school admissions process is scary but simultaneously fun. It’s fun to begin to decide your future, even in eighth grade, where your high school acceptance may determine the friends that you make, and ultimately shape your interests and what you want as a potential career.
However, all of the emphasis on specialized high schools obscures the true significance behind the high school admissions process: that the most important thing is to apply to schools that students are genuinely interested in, and not just because of the school’s reputation.
Four years later, as I look back on my time in high school, I am glad that I committed to a school where I can wake up fifteen minutes before class starts, and still be on time. Thomas Edison provides students with certifications in course subjects that other high schools do not, and students can graduate with certifications and immediately apply for jobs in these fields. I am graduating with both a certification in Architecture and a sense of great admiration for my community.
In addition to a school atmosphere that is diverse and inclusive of the student body, we haven’t been conditioned to view success just through test scores. For all of these reasons, I do not regret my decision. I made pretty awesome friends, and to this day, I believe that I will be receiving the same diploma as my friends who travel three hours to get to their specialized high schools.
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